The One Desire Men Have Beyond Intimacy
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Chapter 1: Understanding Men's Core Desire
From a young age, I was taught by my mother that men were primarily interested in sex. In school, boys who lost their virginity first were often admired, earning the title of "Alpha males." Their ability to attract girls gave them a sense of dominance. Those who hadn’t yet engaged in sexual experiences sometimes fabricated stories to fit in with their peers.
I witnessed the damaging effects of these lies on girls’ reputations, as some boys sought to elevate their status at the expense of others. It struck me as both ridiculous and reprehensible how far some men would go to boast about their conquests.
As I matured and interacted with numerous men across various settings, I came to a profound realization: for them, it was never solely about sex.
What truly drives men is a deeper need—respect. This fundamental desire influences their choices and actions throughout life. They pursue careers that earn them esteem in the eyes of family and friends, seek relationships where they feel valued, and even engage in conflicts to assert their respectability and strength.
Examining popular films and series aimed at men reveals a recurring theme: the journey of a man striving to build a legacy or a name for himself. Conversations about sex during my school days weren’t merely about physical intimacy; they revolved around the quest for respect. Young men discussed their interactions with women not simply to boast but to gain the admiration of their peers.
Ultimately, their actions boil down to one significant goal: earning respect.
Section 1.1: The Importance of Respect in Relationships
Men require respect in their relationships just as women seek love. They often prefer to feel respected and unfulfilled rather than loved and disrespected. This explains why they might choose a "pure and good" partner over someone who excites them but lacks traditional morals. They wish to project the image of a respectable family man with strong values.
When I jokingly asked friends why they wouldn't date someone with an OnlyFans account, even if she were their ideal partner, they expressed that they couldn't bear the thought of being the subject of ridicule among peers. Their concern for how others perceive them often outweighs their own happiness with a loved one. They despise feeling deceived, not necessarily due to affection for the individual, but because they detest appearing foolish.
Section 1.2: The Quest for Validation
Men also tend to shy away from women who challenge them. They prefer to feel dominant and accomplished, and if a woman makes them feel inferior or belittled, they are unlikely to find satisfaction in that relationship.
I recall working with a man who decided to part ways with his wife because he found her unexciting and "boring." As I listened to him, I realized that she was a dedicated mother and a hard worker, but he craved more excitement. He met someone new who seemed to provide the thrill he desired, only to later discover her with another man. Although they hadn’t established exclusivity, he felt betrayed. Eventually, he returned to his wife, recognizing that he sought a partner who respected and valued him, regardless of the seriousness of their relationship.
Chapter 2: Respect Over Wealth
Men often prioritize respect over wealth or influence. When I asked friends whether they would accept a morally dubious job that brought them wealth but disdain, they almost unanimously preferred to remain poor yet respected rather than rich and scorned.
Respect is a lifelong pursuit for men. I have witnessed them go to great lengths to achieve it, as it serves as their motivation to reach personal and professional milestones.
If you genuinely wish to capture a man's interest, don't entice him with sex, money, favors, love, or friendship. Instead, demonstrate your respect for him.
Men spend their lives searching for environments where they feel honored and esteemed. If you can provide that sense of respect, they will be inclined to reciprocate with everything you desire.
I have secured promotions, assistance on projects, and even small favors by simply showing respect and admiration to others. I have maintained friendships for years because my friends feel valued and respected in my company, while I have lost connections due to failing to provide others with the acknowledgment they believed they deserved.
Men crave more than just physical intimacy; they long for recognition, admiration, and, above all, respect. This last aspect holds greater significance for them than any other achievement in life.
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