The Initiation

Having approached magic mushrooms with the mindset of trying everything once, I never anticipated that a familiar fungus would radically change my life. Growing up, my family had many rituals surrounding these mushrooms, creating a sense of connection before my journey even began.

My parents and grandparents often foraged for various mushrooms in the forests during spring and autumn, fostering my bond with them and nature as a whole.

Twenty years later, in London, a close friend excitedly shared his recent experiences with mushrooms. Let’s clarify one thing:

No one can truly grasp the experience without having undergone it.

I found myself somewhat bewildered by my friend’s enthusiastic storytelling, filled with concepts that were beyond my comprehension at the time. His excitement and depth were overwhelming.

However, if you know me or have read my previous writings, you’re aware of my curiosity and developed spiritual side, which drew me toward his mushroom universe. Having recently exited a relationship and feeling lost, I likely viewed this as a form of escapism — and what a journey it would be.

The Preparation

I have generally steered clear of conventional medicine, perhaps due to my upbringing on a farm or a strong intuition that it wasn't the path for me. I’ve always believed that many deep-seated emotional wounds we carry need addressing, rather than simply treating symptoms.

At that point in my life, I recognized I had psychological wounds, but I couldn’t pinpoint their source. I merely sensed that my relationships were suffering.

Soon after my friend’s compelling tales, I decided to embark on a psychedelic adventure. For weeks, we engaged in healthy eating, meditation, and nature walks, with my friend providing various resources. Reflecting on my journey, I realize no amount of information could have prepared me for what lay ahead. True insights come from within, and any preconceived notions are just the ego’s attempt to maintain control. My ego certainly faced a challenge during my second session, but that’s a story for later.

The Magic

#### 1. Parts of You Need Love and Attention Dose: 1g

My initial experience was gentle yet grounding. I encountered a tree — a recurring symbol in my journeys — and water. The tree, half burnt yet still thriving, resonated with my own health struggles. Tears flowed from my right eye as I released that pain.

My intention was clear: reveal what I need to heal. The rest of the experience involved floating on water, surrounded by colorful fairies guiding me. I found myself gazing at a tree, feeling nature vibrantly alive, interspersed with laughter.

#### 2. Ignoring Wounds Leads to Greater Pain Dose: 2g

While my first experience blended reality with mystical elements, the second plunged into geometric realms. Increasing the dosage peeled back the layers of reality, allowing my ego to dissolve and perceive a larger existence.

This time, I entered the tree, its walls adorned with eyes — a common theme in psychedelic experiences. I felt a powerful presence, almost angelic. I welcomed my mom into this consciousness, and we embraced, releasing emotions in a profound wave of catharsis.

Time and space faded, and I felt a sense of belonging in the universe. After this embrace, I encountered a white lion, symbolizing divine consciousness, and experienced a connection that transcended words.

#### 3. The Answers Reside Within Dose: 2.5g

Embarking on this journey reveals truths within yourself that are independent of external influences.

During my 2.5g and 3.5g experiences, I activated my Kundalini, achieving a deep connection with my inner self. My tree appeared again, now floating in the air, with its roots containing all the world’s creatures. A powerful woman emerged, embodying the Divine Feminine, and imparted wisdom: the answers lie within you; just close your eyes and listen.

#### 4. Ego Death and Rebirth Dose: 3.5g

For my fourth session, I prepared for an intense experience at a friend’s house. Almost immediately, I lost all sense of time and identity, enveloped by a peaceful presence.

However, the experience was interrupted when our sitter received a call. In that quiet moment, I faced my childhood pains, recognizing my friend as the father who abandoned me. I felt reborn, realizing I needed to pursue therapy.

#### 5. Challenging Trips Bring Valuable Lessons Dose: 4.44g

Many recount their challenging experiences with psychedelics, yet often, these lead to profound insights if approached with an open heart.

I ventured alone into my garden, where music melded with vibrant images. The tree from my earlier journeys reappeared, and I was accompanied by a little girl — my inner child. I urged her to heal herself, realizing I had expected her to do the work while I indulged in life’s wonders.

In the aftermath, I confronted my fears, reaffirming my commitment to never abandon my inner child again.

The Integration

Experiencing such profound insights prompts the question: How to integrate these lessons into daily life?

I sought therapy to explore my past and make sense of my mushroom experiences. This journey transformed my perspective, especially regarding psychedelics.

Conclusions

In previous discussions, I noted that psychedelic art often reflects common symbols across different experiences — butterflies, cats, lions, forests, fractals, and eyes. This suggests a collective language through which these plants communicate. Each symbol holds unique meaning for different individuals, hinting at a spiritual intelligence inherent in these experiences.

I leave you with these reflections:

1. You can’t solve a problem with the same consciousness that created it.
2. Once your mind expands through new experiences, it cannot revert to its former state.
3. Psychedelics can unveil profound discoveries about yourself in a brief period.

For those eager to delve deeper, the video below offers a more structured exploration of this topic.